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Belle looks traditionally Thai — petite and tan-skinned.

She thinks that her appearance doesn’t live up to society’s definition of beauty, making it even more difficult for her to date. The fact that I realize this makes me limit myself from going after someone,” she said.

Given how many Western men relish the more “traditional” (read: pre-feminist revolution) concept of male-female relationships they sometimes encounter here, that’s perhaps not surprising.

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Ying, 30, said she had had a crush on her current boyfriend long before they went out.

Even though he was Korean — and so, perhaps, not so judgmental — she waited for him to make the first move.

Because of this, Thais may approach relationships more seriously than Westerners, who are comfortable chatting up complete strangers as well as with the phenomena of “friends with benefits,” “seeing each other,” and “not labeling things.” It might be due to this that most Bangkok women find themselves dating the people they come across in their social circle — and only those of the same or higher social class to boot.

Call it having standards, call it ticking off a checklist, but they tend to go out with someone they already know to have the qualities they want, rather than “wasting time” learning about a complete stranger.

“It’s tough for women to approach someone they’re interested in in public,” Ann said.

Belle added, “I wouldn’t approach a guy sitting across the bar. Nicha, 29, has also never been on a date, a situation that is not uncommon in Thailand.

So, while chatting and giggling to friends about guys you like may be hilarious, the sad truth is that many Thai women seem to put themselves in the relatively hopeless position of playing the waiting game — just praying that the men they like will like them back and take the initiative.

Comic strip “honesty sandwich,” by young Thai female artist Tuna Dunn, hilariously illustrates what it’s like to be a Thai woman, who hopes for a sign about a guy rather than confess her attraction to him.

Belle* is 28 years old and has never been on a date in her life. Remember, you’re a beautiful, chatty, lovely person!

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